Executive Presence Online: Building a Portfolio Site and LinkedIn That Sells You

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Marketing Isn’t Magic—It’s Math (With Better Fonts)

Let’s get one thing straight: marketing isn’t a mystical art practiced by hoodie-wearing wizards who whisper to algorithms under a full moon. It’s not a vibe. It’s not a “feeling.” And it sure as hell isn’t just about going viral on TikTok because your intern danced with a llama.

Marketing is math. It’s strategy. It’s systems. It’s spreadsheets with more tabs than a conspiracy theorist’s browser. And yes, it’s also storytelling—but storytelling with a P&L attached.

The Myth of the Marketing Unicorn

Somewhere along the way, we started believing that great marketing is about finding a unicorn—a magical campaign that explodes overnight, gets 10 million views, and turns your brand into the next Liquid Death. (Spoiler alert: Liquid Death had a killer strategy, not just a cool name.)

But here’s the truth bomb:

“Marketing isn’t about finding unicorns. It’s about building a damn horse that runs fast, every day, without dying.”

That means building systems that scale, not just campaigns that sparkle. It means understanding your numbers better than your agency understands buzzwords. And it means treating marketing like a business function—not a creative playground for your cousin who once made a viral meme.

Framework: The Marketing Math Stack

Let’s break down the Marketing Math Stack—because if you can’t measure it, you can’t scale it. And if you can’t scale it, you’re just burning cash with prettier PowerPoints.

1. CAC (Customer Acquisition Cost)

How much are you paying to get a customer? If you don’t know this number, you’re not doing marketing—you’re doing hope. And hope is not a strategy. It’s a Netflix category.

2. LTV (Lifetime Value)

How much is a customer worth over time? If your LTV is lower than your CAC, congratulations—you’re paying people to not buy from you again. That’s not marketing. That’s charity.

3. Conversion Rate

If your landing page converts like a wet sponge, no amount of ad spend will save you. Fix the funnel before you pour more water into it.

4. Retention Rate

Acquisition is sexy. Retention is profitable. If your customers ghost you after one purchase, maybe it’s not them—it’s you. (Or your onboarding email that reads like a tax form.)

Case Study: The SaaS Startup That Stopped Guessing

One of our clients—a B2B SaaS startup—was spending $50K/month on paid ads and couldn’t figure out why growth was flatter than a soda left open overnight. They had a killer product, a decent brand, and a marketing team that could write copy smoother than Sinatra in silk.

But they weren’t tracking CAC by channel. They didn’t know their LTV by segment. And their attribution model was basically “whoever yells the loudest in the meeting gets credit.”

We implemented a simple dashboard:

CAC by channel (Google, LinkedIn, organic, email)
LTV by customer cohort
Funnel conversion rates at every stage
Churn rate by product tier

Within 60 days, they cut spend on underperforming channels, doubled down on high-LTV segments, and increased MRR by 28%—without increasing budget. That’s not magic. That’s math with a marketing hat on.

Stop Chasing Trends. Start Building Engines.

Every week, there’s a new shiny object: Threads, BeReal, AI-generated haikus, whatever. And every week, marketers panic like raccoons in a flashlight beam, scrambling to “get on the trend.”

But trends don’t build businesses. Engines do. Engines that:

Predictably generate leads
Convert those leads into revenue
Retain and upsell customers over time

Want to be a marketing rockstar? Build a system that works when you’re not looking. That’s the difference between a campaign and a company.

Marketing Tips You Can Use Before Your Coffee Gets Cold

Audit your funnel: Where are people dropping off? Fix that first.
Know your numbers: If you can’t recite your CAC and LTV in your sleep, you’re not ready to scale.
Kill vanity metrics: Impressions don’t pay the bills. Revenue does.
Test like a scientist: One variable at a time. No more “let’s change everything and see what happens.”
Automate the boring stuff: If you’re still manually sending follow-up emails, we need to talk.

The Bottom Line (Literally)

Marketing isn’t about being the loudest. It’s about being the smartest. It’s about building systems that scale, strategies that convert, and stories that sell. And yes, it’s about making spreadsheets sexy again.

So the next time someone tells you marketing is all about “vibes,” hand them a calculator and a copy of your funnel metrics. Then go build something that prints revenue while they’re still trying to go viral on a platform no one uses anymore.

Because at the end of the day, marketing isn’t magic—it’s math. With better fonts.

Mark Gabrielli
Founder, MarkCMO
[email protected]
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