• Table of Contents

  • Marketing Isn’t Magic—It’s Math (With Better Fonts)
  • The Myth of the Marketing Unicorn
  • Framework: The 3M Model (Message, Math, Momentum)
  • 1. Message: Say Something That Matters
  • 2. Math: Know Your Numbers or Die Trying
  • 3. Momentum: Build Systems, Not One-Hit Wonders
  • Case Study: The SaaS Startup That Stopped Chasing Rainbows
  • Stop Worshipping the Algorithm
  • Marketing Is a Business Function, Not a Vibe
  • Final Thought: Be the CFO’s Favorite Marketer

Marketing Isn’t Magic—It’s Math (With Better Fonts)

Let’s get one thing straight: marketing isn’t a mystical art practiced by hoodie-wearing wizards who whisper to algorithms under a full moon. It’s not a vibe. It’s not a TikTok dance. It’s not even “going viral” (whatever that means anymore—your grandma’s banana bread recipe went viral in 2020, and we all know how that turned out).

Marketing is math. It’s strategy. It’s systems. And yes, it’s a little bit of swagger. But if your marketing plan can’t survive a CFO’s spreadsheet, it’s not a plan—it’s a Pinterest board with a budget.

The Myth of the Marketing Unicorn

Somewhere along the way, we started believing that great marketing is about finding “the one big idea” that will change everything. Like there’s a unicorn campaign out there just waiting to gallop in and save your Q4.

Here’s the truth bomb:

“If your marketing strategy depends on luck, it’s not a strategy—it’s a lottery ticket with a logo.”

Real marketing is built on repeatable systems, measurable outcomes, and a deep understanding of your customer. Not fairy dust and a Canva subscription.

Framework: The 3M Model (Message, Math, Momentum)

Let me introduce you to a framework that won’t make your eyes glaze over like a stale donut at a trade show. It’s called the 3M Model:

1. Message: Say Something That Matters

Your brand message should be so clear it could survive a game of corporate telephone. If your value prop needs a 12-slide deck to explain, it’s not a value prop—it’s a TED Talk no one asked for.

• Know your audience’s pain points like you know your Netflix password (by heart, and with a little shame).
• Speak human. Not “synergistic solutions for scalable growth.”
• Test your message in the wild—emails, ads, landing pages. If it doesn’t convert, it doesn’t work.

2. Math: Know Your Numbers or Die Trying

Marketing without metrics is like driving blindfolded—fast, exciting, and guaranteed to end in a flaming wreck.

• What’s your CAC (Customer Acquisition Cost)? If you don’t know, your CFO does—and they’re sweating.
• What’s your LTV (Lifetime Value)? If it’s lower than your CAC, congrats—you’re paying people to leave.
• Track conversion rates like your job depends on it. Because it does.

Pro tip: If your dashboard looks like the cockpit of a 747, simplify. You don’t need 47 KPIs. You need 3 that matter.

3. Momentum: Build Systems, Not One-Hit Wonders

One good campaign is a fluke. A system that delivers consistent results? That’s how CMOs get promoted instead of politely “restructured.”

• Create repeatable playbooks for content, paid media, and lifecycle marketing.
• Automate what you can. Delegate what you can’t. And kill what doesn’t move the needle.
• Build a marketing engine, not a marketing moment.

Case Study: The SaaS Startup That Stopped Chasing Rainbows

Let’s talk about a real company—call them “SaaSy McStartup.” They were burning $100K/month on paid ads with no clear attribution. Their CEO thought “brand awareness” meant sponsoring a local pickleball tournament.

We applied the 3M Model:

• Message: We rewrote their homepage to focus on one clear benefit. Bounce rate dropped 30%.
• Math: We set up proper UTM tracking and found that 80% of their conversions came from one channel. Guess where we doubled down?
• Momentum: We built a content engine that delivered 10 qualified leads per week—without spending another dime on ads.

Result? CAC dropped by 40%, and the CEO stopped asking if we should “try Snapchat.”

Stop Worshipping the Algorithm

Look, I get it. The algorithm is the boogeyman of modern marketing. But if your entire strategy is “hope the algorithm likes us today,” you’re not a marketer—you’re a contestant on America’s Got TikTok.

Instead, focus on what you can control:

• Your message
• Your funnel
• Your customer experience

Algorithms change. Good strategy doesn’t.

Marketing Is a Business Function, Not a Vibe

Let’s stop treating marketing like it’s the arts and crafts department of the business. We’re not here to “make things pretty.” We’re here to drive revenue, build pipeline, and make sales teams cry tears of joy.

If your marketing team isn’t sitting at the revenue table, you’re doing it wrong. And if your CMO can’t talk CAC, LTV, and ROAS without Googling acronyms, you’ve got a problem bigger than your bounce rate.

Final Thought: Be the CFO’s Favorite Marketer

Want to win in marketing? Make your CFO love you. Speak their language. Show them the math. Prove that every dollar spent is a dollar invested—not a dollar thrown into the “brand awareness” bonfire.

Because at the end of the day, marketing isn’t magic. It’s math—with better fonts, sharper copy, and a killer sense of humor.

TL;DR (Too Long; Definitely Read)</h2