• Table of Contents

  • Marketing Isn’t Magic—It’s Math (With Better Fonts)
  • The Big Idea: Marketing Is a System, Not a Slot Machine
  • Step 1: Know Your Numbers (Yes, All of Them)
  • Step 2: Build a Funnel, Not a Fire Drill
  • Step 3: Stop Chasing Trends—Start Building Assets
  • Step 4: Align With Sales or Die Trying
  • Step 5: Test, Learn, Repeat (Then Scale)

Marketing Isn’t Magic—It’s Math (With Better Fonts)

Let’s get one thing straight: marketing isn’t a mystical art practiced by robe-wearing creatives in candlelit rooms. It’s not a Ouija board session where we summon “brand awareness” from the spirit realm. It’s math. It’s systems. It’s strategy. And yes, it’s got better fonts and a few more GIFs than your average spreadsheet—but don’t let the aesthetics fool you.

If your marketing plan sounds like “go viral” or “let’s just make a killer video,” congratulations—you’ve just built a business plan on a unicorn’s back. And spoiler alert: unicorns don’t scale.

The Big Idea: Marketing Is a System, Not a Slot Machine

Too many companies treat marketing like Vegas. They throw money at ads, cross their fingers, and hope the ROI gods smile upon them. But hope is not a strategy. And slot machines are a terrible business model—unless you own the casino.

Here’s the truth bomb you didn’t know you needed:

“Marketing isn’t about luck. It’s about leverage. Build the machine, then pour gas on it.”

Let’s break down how to build that machine—no magic wands required.

Step 1: Know Your Numbers (Yes, All of Them)

If you can’t tell me your CAC, LTV, and conversion rate faster than you can name your favorite font, we’ve got a problem. Marketing is a math game. And if you’re not playing with numbers, you’re just playing.

• CAC (Customer Acquisition Cost): How much does it cost to get a customer? If you don’t know, you’re probably spending too much.
• LTV (Lifetime Value): How much is a customer worth over time? If your LTV is lower than your CAC, congrats—you’re paying people to be your customers.
• Conversion Rate: What percentage of people actually do the thing you want them to do? (No, “liking” your post doesn’t count.)

Track these. Obsess over them. Tattoo them on your forehead if you have to. Because if you don’t know your numbers, you’re not doing marketing—you’re doing performance art.

Step 2: Build a Funnel, Not a Fire Drill

Most companies don’t have a marketing funnel. They have a marketing panic attack. One week it’s webinars, the next it’s TikTok dances, and by Friday someone’s suggesting a billboard in Times Square “just to get our name out there.”

Here’s a simple funnel framework that actually works:

• Top of Funnel (TOFU): Awareness. Get attention with content, ads, SEO, or PR. Think of this as the “first date” phase—don’t propose marriage yet.
• Middle of Funnel (MOFU): Consideration. Nurture leads with email, case studies, and retargeting. This is where you show them you’re not just a pretty landing page.
• Bottom of Funnel (BOFU): Conversion. Close the deal with demos, offers, and sales enablement. Time to pop the question (or at least ask for the credit card).

Each stage needs its own strategy, content, and KPIs. If you’re using the same message for everyone, you’re either lazy or lost. Or both.

Step 3: Stop Chasing Trends—Start Building Assets

Every week there’s a new shiny object: Threads, Clubhouse, BeReal, whatever Elon’s tweeting about. But real marketers don’t chase trends—they build assets.

What’s an asset? It’s something that compounds over time. Like:

• SEO content that ranks for years
• Email lists you own (not rent)
• Brand equity that makes people choose you over cheaper options
• Customer communities that sell for you

Trends are sugar highs. Assets are compound interest. Choose wisely.

Step 4: Align With Sales or Die Trying

If your marketing and sales teams are in a cold war, your revenue is the first casualty. Alignment isn’t a buzzword—it’s a business imperative.

Here’s how to make it happen:

• Shared KPIs: Leads are cute, but revenue is sexier. Align on pipeline and closed deals.
• Feedback Loops: Sales should tell marketing what’s working. Marketing should listen. (Yes, really.)
• SLA Agreements: Define what a qualified lead is. Put it in writing. Frame it if you have to.

When marketing and sales are in sync, magic happens. When they’re not, you get finger-pointing and sad dashboards.

Step 5: Test, Learn, Repeat (Then Scale)

Marketing isn’t a one-and-done game. It’s a lab. You test hypotheses, measure results, and iterate. If you’re not running experiments, you’re not learning. And if you’re not learning, you’re losing.

Here’s a simple testing framework:

• Hypothesis: “If we change the CTA from ‘Learn More’ to ‘Get the Damn Guide,’ conversions will increase.”
• Test: A/B test it with a statistically significant sample.
• Measure: Use real metrics, not vibes.
• Decide: Scale what works. Kill what doesn’t. Repeat.

Marketing is a game of inches.